*Post wedi'i ddiweddaru - Llyfrau Byw newydd wedi'u hychwanegu!*
Cadwch y dyddiad! Dewch i ‘fenthyca’ ein Llyfrau Byw ar 21 a 23 Mawrth.
Mae grŵp y gwasanaethau cynhwysol a Ffydd a Diwylliant @BywydCampws wrthi'n cydweithio i gyflwyno digwyddiad Llyfrau Byw fel rhan o Ŵyl y Darlun Mwy ym mis Mawrth 2023.
Nod y digwyddiad yw hyrwyddo deialog, lleihau rhagfarn, ac annog dealltwriaeth trwy ryngweithio dynol. Bydd Llyfrau Byw yn rhannu profiad personol neu safbwynt ar fywyd arwyddocaol. Gall ymwelwyr â’r digwyddiad fenthyca Llyfr Byw gyfer trafodaeth bersonol sy’n para am 15 munud pan gânt eu hannog i ofyn cwestiynau a dysgu mwy am stori’r Llyfr Byw.
Gallwch siarad â'n cyfranwyr Llyfrau Byw yn Creu Taliesin, Campws Singleton ar 21 Mawrth ac yn Y Twyni, Campws y Bae ar 23 Mawrth. Er nad oes angen cofrestru, cofiwch fod cyfranwyr Llyfrau Byw yn rhoi eu hamser am ddim ac mae ganddynt ymrwymiadau eraill i'w hystyried, felly efallai na fyddant ar gael pan fyddwch yn ymweld. Dyma ein Llyfrau Byw sydd wedi’u cadarnhau:
Amber Arrowsmith
DAN-15
The meaning of this abbreviation is just one of the many things I have learnt that I pray with all my heart other people never have to fully understand.
Two weeks before the UK entered official Covid-19 restrictions, my family were already in their own self-imposed ‘lockdown’. Our daughter had attempted suicide in school. Again. She was no longer considered safe to attend. We asked the GP for help. Again. It had not been forthcoming for the previous two years. We were told she did not look like a typical depressed teenager. The official advice: take up badminton.
Then came the Pandemic. My team, being the Front of House for IT were extremely busy helping people to get set up to WFH. Everyone faced their own unique challenges, personally and professionally. I worked harder from my kitchen table that March than I have ever worked in my life. I was exhausted by April. In May, I noticed that my daughter was not eating much and was increasingly withdrawn. We asked for help. Again. Services were no longer operating. Sorry.
Seeing my vibrant, funny, high-achieving and extremely loving daughter become consumed by the evil of Anorexia Nervosa was like watching a horror film unfold in my own home. Where did this insidious beast come from? Had it been lurking all along? What had given it the power it needed to destroy my daughter? The only thing I knew for sure was that this beast was not welcome.
I read everything I could. I contacted everyone I could. I did everything I could. Again, again, again….
Eventually, caring became a full-time responsibility in addition to my usual parenting role. Trust me when I say that they are not the same thing. I had to take time out of work. This was incredibly hard for me. Guilt had a major impact on my own well-being. Not least the guilt of not making this decision sooner.
Following more suicide attempts than my heart can bare, countless self-harm incidents and a 6-month admission at a Children’s Mental Health Facility , my daughter was diagnosed with Quiet BPD. Four whole years after she first asked for help.
Having turned eighteen, she was discharged from CAMHS in June and has since been transferred to Adult Mental Health Services. She remains seriously unwell and requires 24/7 support, but she is in recovery from the BPD symptom of Anorexia Nervosa and as I write this, she is getting ready for a meal out with her friends. I have returned to work and she is halfway through her final year in college. We are closer than ever.
We are also armed with information, risk assessments and coping strategies now but the thing that has got us thorough it all is hope. Finding solace in the small things every day. And that is where the kindness of strangers has played a vital role and why I am sharing my story and my hope with you.
Em Cookson-Williams
Non-binary in a binary world.
To say I came out as non-binary at 30 sounds too simplistic. I come out as non-binary on a daily basis. Some days my gender identity doesn’t play a big part in my interactions or connections and I feel able to be fluid in my existence, just being me, being Em. Other days my gender identity is brought into sharp focus, having to duck and dive around gender binary norms and expectations and make swift decisions on whether to speak my truth and break the binary (and sometimes people’s minds) or whether to oblige in sitting in the box marked 0 or 1 picked out for me.
In many ways I wish the language around being non-binary had become available to me at a younger age. I do wonder whether being older makes it harder – so many more relationships and connections made that need to be updated on who I am or corrected in how to identify me. Strangely I do find it easier to correct misgendering with people I have just met rather than my own friends and family. But should I have to correct misgendering at all? Is it my responsibility alone to reshape the binary framing of the people in my world, where I am non-binary.
Tara Crank
My book will be characterised by the growth throughout my life - including my love of my work, my identity as a mixed race person and my passion for learning all sorts. All this has led me to some places I've personally found totally amazing...and incredibly difficult, including representing Great Britain at a fencing competition in France...without any safety equipment or even a sword! My most recent endeavour is finding a way to light a fire with a banana.
I am fortunate to be able to say I have nature as a key part of my every day life - in work and in my home life. I travel all around the UK for my work, teaching people about wildlife, nature, bushcraft and sensitive outdoor living skills. Some of my main work is to train professionals and to work with adults who struggle with their mental health. I am also a musician and love to share songs whether on the stage or around a fire. I feel I have learned a huge deal about myself in the last couple of years that has given me a new freedom with which to see and explore the world. I look forward to sharing this with you in the library.
Mohsen El-Beltagi
There were many challenges I had to face when moving to the UK. As I came from an Arab culture and Muslim society, I found it very challenging to be familiar with the British culture and different faiths environments.
I was convinced by my surroundings that the idea or perception of the western society such as the UK was quite negative. I had many thoughts on whether society would accept me for my religion, and I was afraid of getting judged and treated differently from others. This is due to my influenced thoughts of the UK not being welcoming and often judging of others and ethnic minorities. Over the first years of my experience in the UK, my viewership and speculations expeditiously changed. So I would like to share with my readers the challenges that I have faced and my own personal experience, specifically how I have overcome and built upon them.
Kirsty Hill
Life with stripes
The zebra is often used as a symbol for rare medical conditions, based on a quote by Dr. Theodore Woodward:
“When you hear hoofbeats, think horses, not zebras.”
Life isn’t always black and white, it doesn’t always conform to straight lines, my life is certainly no exception. Born with Fraser Syndrome (a very rare genetic condition), my life has been full of labels: ‘deaf-blind’, ‘disabled’, all of which have impacted on my sense of inclusion, and expectations of me by others. I spent many years feeling alone, never wanting to accept my condition as part of who I am, because I felt misunderstood, like I was the only one.
However, developing several chronic conditions (on top of my existing disabilities) during my teenage years, has thought me that sometimes having a label can give answers, shedding light on the depth of issues that can be invisible to others.
So here I am, just another zebra, standing on the other side of countless surgeries/medications, with more likely to come. Uncertainty still lies ahead, but I am proud to showcase my uniqueness, and determined to ‘wear my stripes’!
Theresa Ogbekhiulu
Moving from Nigeria, to Swansea University, an institution with predominantly White students was a pivotal point in understanding my identity as a part of a "minority".
Although the cultural diversity was evident, I always thought the University could do more to celebrate the diversity and support students from those backgrounds. Rather than standing on the side-lines of change, I decided to be a part of the change by occupying student leadership positions, influencing policies, lobbying the University's leadership, and now directly responsible for that change. Find out more when you speak to me.
Shaun, the Rock and Roll Outlaw
I was born in London to Irish parents. We have a very large and loving family and they mean the world to me. They have been a great support throughout my life. Rock music has been my constant companion. I’m also a devoted Spurs supporter. I moved to Swansea in 2004 and I absolutely love it here. My volunteering work at Discovery has been my rock. I’ve made friends and made a contribution to local life. I hate violence. My biggest wish is for everyone to live in peace and listen to rock and roll music every day.
Sophie Smith
(Gall Sophie siarad â chi yn Gymraeg neu yn Saesneg)
Yn ôl yn yr oes cyn Covid (cofio honno?!), roeddwn i wedi bod drwy ychydig o dwnnel yn fy mywyd dros gyfnod o flynyddoedd lle'r oedd hi’n teimlo bod popeth yn mynd o chwith. Yn ystod cyfnod o ddwy flynedd, roeddwn i wedi dod yn fam sengl i ddau fab ac mewn corwynt o broblemau a drama gyda’u tad, gan arwain yn y pen draw at ymwneud â’r Heddlu a’r llysoedd. Yn yr un cyfnod, bu’n rhaid i fi gael llawdriniaeth frys oherwydd problem gyda fy nghefn a oedd yn achosi poen ac yn cyfyngu ar yr hyn gallwn i ei wneud am flynyddoedd, cefais newid annisgwyl o ran gyrfa a’r holl addasiadau sy’n rhan o hynny, ac roedd fy mam wedi bod yn yr ysbyty am amser hir oherwydd problem gyda’i chalon…. Roedd y problemau’n pentyrru ac roeddwn i’n dechrau teimlo nad oedd golau ar ddiwedd y twnnel. Dim rhagor o gynnwrf, plîs! Roedd angen ychydig o lonydd ac roedd yn rhaid i fi rywsut gadw fy mhen uwchben y dŵr. A dyna pryd daeth ton Covid a’r cyfnod clo cyntaf….
Roedd cyfnod Covid mor anodd i gynifer o bobl ond, i fi, roedd yn gyfnod o adfywio, gwella ac o ailddarganfod fy hun. Wedi dod allan o gyfnod eitha’ anffodus yn fy mywyd, yn sydyn iawn roedd y tri ohonom yn gaeth i’r tŷ, mewn niwl o ansicrwydd a dryswch. Wrth i’r cyfyngiadau lacio, dechreuais i a’m dau fab fynd i’r môr i chwarae yn y tonnau i gael cysur, ac wrth wneud hynny, ailgysylltais i â rhan ohonof i fy hun roeddwn i wedi ei hesgeuluso am ryw ddau ddegawd. Dim ond mewn pwll nofio roeddwn i wedi nofio fel plentyn, a byth yn y môr. Ac felly prin y gallwn i fod wedi rhagweld y byddwn i’n nofio i Ffrainc ac yn concro’r Sianel o fewn dwy flynedd o ddechrau hamddena yn y môr yn gwisgo het wlanog. Anodd fyddai wedi dychmygu y byddwn i o fewn dwy flynedd yn un o dim ond 30 o Gymry, a llai na 2,500 o bobl yn fyd-eang, i wneud hynny. (Mae mwy na 30,000 o bobl wedi dringo Everest!). Mae’n wir yr oeddwn i wedi bod yn nofiwr brwd pan oeddwn i’n blentyn ac yn ystod fy arddegau ond er i fi fod yn nofiwr da, doeddwn i ddim yn gyflym ac felly roedd ymdeimlad o fethiant wedi fy nilyn drwy gydol fy mywyd wrth feddwl am y peth. Roedd nofio wedi’i ymblethu’n dynn yn hanes fy nheulu: roedd fy nhad-cu’n hyfforddwr nofio, roedd gen i anti ac wncl oedd wedi cyrraedd safon uchel iawn yn gystadleuol ac roedd fy mam wedi gweithio ar y traethau fel achubwr bywyd bob haf. Ond yn ddigalon, roeddwn i wedi troi fy nghefn ar nofio gan feddwl nad oeddwn i ‘fel nhw’, gyda’r pryder mai fi oedd yr unig un wnaeth byth ragori yn fy nilyn fel cysgod digroeso. Ond eto, yn sgil y pandemig, ac ar hap mewn ffordd, rwy wedi mynd yn ôl at fy ngorffennol bron, gan ddod i garu’r dŵr a nofio unwaith eto. Ac i’r plentyn ifanc a oedd bob amser â chywilydd am ddod yn olaf, galla i edrych yn ôl erbyn hyn fel yr oedolyn yr ydw i heddiw, wynebu rhai o’r hen fwganod a’u trechu.
Siân Thomas
It was an Instagram Reel. “Oh, that’s funny” I thought as the random video showed a few aspects of Women with ADHD. They resonated with me but didn’t cause any further thought. Then the cookies learned I watched it and generated more on my Reel feed. Then it started getting almost spooky. Urgency to speak in social situations? Tick. Have a directors commentary in your head when you’re speaking to people? Hey, how did they know that? Buy all you need for a hobby and then get bored of it after a few weeks? Yep. Reminder to self: invent a Hobby Swap App where I can hand over my origami materials for a starter kit to crochet.
After being called out by the internet I decided to investigate properly. I checked an 18-question screening questionnaire which was full of little personal attacks. I laughed through it because it was such a relief to be seen, to suddenly discover a list of things describing me. An explanation. So many things nuanced to this diagnosis.
For every 4 males that get diagnosed with ADHD, 1 female does. Source. There is currently a huge movement of people assigned female at birth being diagnosed because this information has shown us that actually, just because you weren’t Bart Simpson in school, doesn’t mean you don’t have ADHD. We tend to have in-brain hyperactivity. Some of us are all singing and dancing with bells on. Some are more inattentive. Some compulsive. Some all 3, hyperactive, compulsive and innatentive. Hello, that’s me. Got to be special, see.
By sharing my story I have caused a few people to pursue their own diagnosis. I have been an active invisible disability campaigner for 5+ years and have seen first-hand how sharing information can help people feel less alone and even find answers. I am also keen to squash misconceptions about ADHD. I feel an ADHD person is a necessary addition and enhancement to any workplace, friendship, relationship or even pub quiz team. Oh my goodness, the trivia we know and have retained in our brains. I think other ADHD’ers feel the same so we do tend to accidentally make friends with one another, even undiagnosed people. (Magnets?)
By the time you meet me I’ll be 7 months into an official ADHD diagnosis and over a year into suspecting I have it. I have learned so much since. Such as 80% of people with ADHD have one parent with it and that didn’t surprise me one bit as during my research and learning, I was painting a complete picture of me but also my lovely Mam.
I am 36 and so have been masking and managing ADHD my entire life, therefore I can be a book that will listen attentively to your question, not interrupt you and try and stick to the point. I guarantee to take you the scenic route in my answers though. It’s a ride.
Ydych chi'n tybio sut beth yw cael diagnosis o ADHD fel oedolyn? Symud i wlad wahanol lle rydych chi yn y lleiafrif yn sydyn? Cefnogi plentyn drwy anawsterau iechyd meddwl ofnadwy? Herio rhagdybiaethau amdanoch chi? Dyna beth mae ein Llyfrau Byw yn ei wneud ac maen nhw am siarad â chi amdano! Ar 21 a 23 Mawrth, bydd cyfle i chi fenthyg ein Llyfrau i gael sgwrs 15-20 munud am eu hunain. Cewch chi flas ar eu stori yn ein postiad blog blaenorol a chewch chi weld eu hargaeledd isod. (Er nad oes angen cofrestru, cofiwch fod cyfranwyr Llyfrau Byw yn rhoi eu hamser am ddim ac mae ganddynt ymrwymiadau eraill i'w hystyried, felly efallai na fyddant ar gael pan fyddwch yn ymweld.)
11.00-16.00 Dydd Mawrth 21 Mawrth – Creu Taliesin, Campws Parc Singleton
Amber Arrowsmith, Em Cookson-Williams, Mohsen El-Beltagi, Kirsty Hill, Theresa Ogbekhiulu, Shaun, Sophie Smith a Siân Thomas
11.00-16.00 Dydd Iau 23 Mawrth – Y Twyni, Campws Y Bae
Tara Crank, Mohsen El-Beltagi, Theresa Ogbekhiulu, Shaun a Siân Thomas